Thursday, August 12, 2010

Burnt Out?

My last post before restarting here was called, Whoever Says It Gets Harder Than This is Lying, and then I didn't post for almost a year and 8 months. A lot has happened. A surprising pregnancy. A miscarriage. A pregnancy. A birth. A beautiful new baby daughter.
There are times where I get so wrapped up in enjoying my 5 closely-spaced children; reading with them, playing games, doing art projects. There are many moments where I just sit and watch them with my heart bursting with love and pride. But sometimes I have scary thoughts. Sometimes I want to run away and be me again. Sometimes I lie awake in the night wondering if I'm a good mom. Am I burnt out? Did I do it right? Will I have regrets? Thank goodness for the long night and bless the new day....

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