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Thursday, December 19, 2013

One Foot in Front of the Other

It snowed in Jerusalem! It was probably the biggest snow storm in 20 years! We didn't get any snow where I live so I was especially enchanted by our drive up the Ein Karem mountains to Shaare Zedek Medical Center in Jerusalem today. While the sun was shinning, beautiful white snow was still frozen and covering much of the hills and was piled high on either side of the roads.

We (my whole family and I) have been waiting for this day to come... the day of answers. The day where we would receive, The Plan. I was hoping that today we'd get some kind of black and white protocol plan for treatment, "the cure for recurrent Ovarian Cancer" but then we got there and quickly realized that the cure is still being made. I may or may not be a candidate for a phase 2 clinical trial drug that could potentially save my life. I may or may not choose to go for a risky and complicated yet aggressive procedure that is still too experimental to prove itself worth the huge risks it also offers. I may or may not choose to wait patiently while enjoying a respite from chemotherapy and enjoy my currently good quality of life until the cancer grows enough "out of control" to mandate immediate treatment. Which option would you hope for?

So, today, no plan for treatment (yet). No answers (yet). HOWEVER... we are planning and my oncologist is making sure we research every possibility before we make a treatment decision and plan. So, that means more meetings with more experts. A PET CT scan. AND lots and lots of hope and prayers.

I'm a runner. I'm a take-action-fast-kind-of-person so this is rough for me. I'm not great at waiting patiently but I'm doing my best. One day at a time, one step at a time. One foot in front of the other.


  1. You are so very inspirational and I wish we knew each other and were friends! I feel a kinship toward you and hope you take the challenge to fight the beast once again. I wish I had your inner strength, maybe its from all that running. Please stay strong and enjoy each day. I hope your road to recovery and full health will be a smooth one. Bless you Erika!

  2. Everything does start with that one crucial step. So it's good that you are on the right path, with all the procedures and precautions you have kept to. We also pray that you get into that clinical trial, and that your cancer be expunged with finality.

    Samuel @ Altus Research

  3. Erika, every one of your smiling photos elicits a smiling response. I wish you could see it! You may sometimes feel like a reverse sabra - sweet and smiley on the outside, prickly or frustrated or struggling on the inside - but your smiles do make a difference out here, whatever the climate at your core.

    Snow in Jerusalem is spectacular; glad you had that drop of serendipity in your trip to the hospital. Onward... one step at a time. And if you need help, friends make great emotional show shoes!