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Monday, November 26, 2018

Their Wet Hair...

Yes my birthday is the 28th... I’m very thankful to make it to another birthday but I won’t be eating cake with this crazy diet.... meh cake isn’t really my thing. I just don’t like being restricted. Every chemo day I’m allowed to eat whatever I want - I usually bring a few small packets of junk food and lately my brother, Eli, has been my “supplier”. I bring my kosher Doritos, instant noodle soup, Cheezits and a few candies from Israel.... I usually eat pizza too.

There’s no cure for cancer. I’ve gone through every possible trial with zilch-results however these doctors in Turkey are able to get patients into remission! That’s huge! I’m praying for that. I can stay alive in a state of remission and we believe that with the Metabolic Theory: I need to starve the cancer which means NO carbohydrates!!! The carbs are like crack-cocaine! They beckon to us in the night when we crave snacks of popcorn, cookies or even just a sandwich.

I was depressed for a while and asking myself why do this to myself?! I was in a daily state of pain; counting down - 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... BLAST OFF to Turkey yet again! I began to hate everything that reminded me of the place, the journey, the disruption of my life. But now I have better pain control and I’m able to think about the future more. My kids are growing up quickly... and I want to be here for them! I’ll tell you - it’s short moments that make life worth it for me like yesterday evening....

Hadas, age 11, had gymnastics a few miles away and she’s learned to take the bus. Eden’s school is very close by. Last night, Eden (age 8) had a special class get-together.... and Hadas took her to and from on the bus! When they got home, they showered and came into my room - I’d just put on some boring old movie  from who-knows-when and I beckoned to Eden to come into my narrow bed with me: wet hair and all! And that snuggle made me feel so alive! Then Hadas appeared with her wet hair and I peeled back the blankets in the other side of me and called her in to cuddle. It was shortly before their bedtime so it wasn’t for very long... but it was precious SO priceless to me. I know they felt my love - I felt theirs and I will cherish moments like those forever.

It’s countdown time to Turkey! My flight is Tuesday: early in the AM so my trek begins in the middle of the night. Oh, how I dread the same old routine - and as blessed as I am to have my father with me, by my side with every step, it’s so very hard to do! It is for him too and he doesn’t have treatments!

Each time, I get a bit better. Perhaps I’m closer to remission? I don’t know but, I’m more alert and in less pain with each treatment. The more healthy I become, the more difficult it is to be patient. I want my old life back. I pray.

I pray I’ll feel that wet hair of my daughters’ many more times, the cold little toes against mine and the squeezes of their fingers around mine that remind me that they’re feeling me too....

Friday, November 23, 2018

What If I Live?

My blah blah and my life journey has been completely influenced by a cancer journey that began in 2012; a dramatic disaster. For the first year and first time going through chemotherapy, I was encouraged by my my oncologist that I had stage 3b cancer, surgery had removed all of the cancerous tumors, and that I was having chemotherapy as a "mop up job" - as a security; just to make sure.

It's clear to me by how quickly the cancer returned and by the path of disease that in retrospect I was always stage 4 and there was no "mop up anything.....".

There are plenty of cancer specialists who will tell you that I shouldn't be alive right now. EVERY treatment failed me. I continued to progress regardless of trying every possible chemotherapy, biological therapy, immunotherapy, and radiation.

No treatment is without it's scars either. I suffer from terrible radiation burns that are both hard to look at and are excruciatingly painful. I have a list of symptoms which, I'm thankful that aren't worse than they are.

By the end of the summer, 2018, I appeared to have weeks to live. My eyes were sunken in. I no longer had an appetite. My daily life consisted of a bedridden existence and pain killers.

From 2012, the option of me living for a long period of time was unrealistic. Though I couldn't imagine me actually dying, (my faith and denial have always been strong) I don't think many people believed I was long for this world. Bless my oncologist for never taking away my hope - which is known to have self-fulfilling properties.

The reality of stage 4 ovarian cancer is tragically impending death. All of the new treatments; PARPS inhibitors, immunotherapy, and whatever the mainstream medical claims are.... are failures. I've tried them all. I've watched my cancer friends die - one by one.

By August, 2018, it looked like The End was near. Different from the past 6 years, I'd now lost my mobility and my life consisted of pain and suffering with "good days" few and far between. My July 30th PET CT scan showed terrible results; cancerous tumors completely taking over my liver, spleen, pelvis, and bowel.

Then came Turkey.... The doctors in Turkey won't promise anything however their work speaks for itself. They're curing stage 4 patients while no other place in the world can make such claims. I arrived in Istanbul at the end of August and began grueling and torturous treatments. Lacking the funds, friends began fundraising to help us pay for the expensive treatments at the private clinic.

After 4 rounds, I underwent a PET CT at home, in Israel. As I wrote in my previous post, both my Israeli oncologist and the radiologist were shocked by the results. Of course! Despite the wonderful fabulous medical care available in Israel, options for treatments had long dried up.

The final (October 29, 2018) report shows a 70-80% reduction in disease load!!!

What if I live???

Suddenly, there's true hope! One by one, we meet Stage 4 cancer patients at ChemoThermia, the Turkish clinic in Istanbul, who arrived on their deathbeds and after 3-6 months of treatments are in remission with no evidence of disease! Not only do we meet the reality of life after stage 4 cancer - I am living proof.... I'm still alive! For the first time, I'm looking forward to my next PET CT scan! May it be G*d's will that I too merit remission and a clean scan!

I need continued support. We are SO happy and blessed to share that our dear friends have created a fundraiser that's raised almost $100,000! THANK YOU so much for your generosity!

So.... what if I live? That is perhaps the title of my first book to be published in the future - G*d willing. Having this true hope of survival obviously changes everything! It's almost too wonderful to be true however I see a happy shinning light at the end of this horrible cancer journey! HOPE!

Please continue to daven/pray for the full recovery of Ahava Emunah bat Chava Ehta.

Please consider making a donation no matter how big or small... every bit helps and donations are tax deductible. There's an option to donate via GoFundMe or via our local synagogue organization and receive a tax receipt with 100% of funds going towards my treatments.

What if I live? I will continue to devote my life to my purpose. Hopefully my purpose is truly to help others and spread love and faith in every way possible.

Wednesday, October 31, 2018

A Letter To You

 Dear friends and family,
Just 2 months ago I was dying. The tumors in my liver and other vital organs were out of control. My life was in tragic danger and all doctors and oncologists that know me had run out of treatment options. 

Two months ago, my liver was so enlarged and full of cancerous tumors; I looked like a heavily pregnant woman. We practically called off celebrating our only son’s Bar Mitzvah and it was likely that I wasn’t going to live to see my Zach becoming a Bar Mitzvah at all.

As you know, my dearest ones, we have been scouring the earth for something - anything to save my life! As I blogged, back a couple of months ago, my father found one clinic that gave him hope. In Istanbul, Turkey, of all places! Thankfully not too far to be completely out of reach - my parents fully researched this place known as: ChemoThermia.

At the end of August, I began receiving treatments here, in Istanbul. Treatments that make me wonder if this is what it’s like to be in Hell. 

I decided, in my heart, that I would continue coming for treatments until my first pet ct. I believed with all my soul that these treatments would save my life. Usually the first scan is performed after 4-6 rounds of treatments. 

As you know, I’ve been in treatment both in Israel and America and as of the end of 2017 they no longer had anything to offer but an impending death sentence. Denial kicked in and so did complications, hospitalizations, pain and suffering.

A few days ago, I had a pet scan in Israel and my oncologist and the radiologist were shocked yet very happy for me.  Objectively the improvements are stunning! The radiologist said, “It’s a good scan!”. My oncologist in Israel said, “You made my day!”, with great emotion and perhaps even a glistening of tears in his eyes, “Whatever you’re doing is working....” And that’s the best news I’ve received in at least 4 years!

Today, my dad and I sat with my Doctor S. here, at ChemoThermia, and reviewed the scans together. As I’d done together with my husband and Professor C., in Israel, just 2 days ago, I saw the evidence with my own eyes.  Every tumor has responded in some way to the treatments! Some tumors completely disappeared. 

As of July 30th, my spleen was one big mass of cancerous tumor and now all active cancer, in my spleen, is resolved! My liver was 3 times normal in July and now it’s back to a normal size. Many tumors have disappeared from my liver and the ones that remain are smaller and glow less strongly on the scan. We reviewed slice after slice of the scan and witnessed the dramatic improvements with tears of happiness in our eyes; my heart racing. 

Now I’ve seen the good news on the actual scans with both Prof C. in Israel AND Dr S in Turkey. I’m exhausted to my core so it’s hard to be emotional right now however, knowing that this Hellish treatment is working against the cancer is phenomenal! 

Let me be clear: I still have cancer.

I still have cancer and this is the ONLY treatment that’s caused tumors to shrink or disappear in 4 years! Today, my life is in less danger but I must continue doing my job which, is coming to Turkey and receiving these grueling treatments and paying for them.

I have osteopenia - severe calcium deficiency and fragile bones. My sternum is broken along with other some bone fractures. The greatest news is that my vital organs are less burdened and more able to function. 

Objectively the improvements are stunning. Just 2 months ago I was dying - my life was coming to an end and now all the news is positive! The only negative part is having to be in treatment yet that’s obviously what’s given me a new chance at living. 

Please continue to pray for my complete recovery. Perhaps consider contributing to my cause; my treatments in Istanbul, Turkey.

With Love,


Monday, October 22, 2018

A Message to My Only Son

Genesis Chapter 12

1And the Lord said to Avram, "Go forth from your land and from your birthplace and from your father's house, to the land that I will show you.אוַיֹּ֤אמֶר יְהֹוָה֙ אֶל־אַבְרָ֔ם לֶךְ־לְךָ֛ מֵֽאַרְצְךָ֥ וּמִמּֽוֹלַדְתְּךָ֖ וּמִבֵּ֣ית אָבִ֑יךָ אֶל־הָאָ֖רֶץ אֲשֶׁ֥ר אַרְאֶֽךָּ:
2And I will make you into a great nation, and I will bless you, and I will aggrandize your name, and [you shall] be a blessing.בוְאֶֽעֶשְׂךָ֙ לְג֣וֹי גָּד֔וֹל וַֽאֲבָ֣רֶכְךָ֔ וַֽאֲגַדְּלָ֖ה שְׁמֶ֑ךָ וֶֽהְיֵ֖ה בְּרָכָֽה:
3And I will bless those who bless you, and the one who curses you I will curse, and all the families of the earth shall be blessed in you."גוַֽאֲבָֽרְכָה֙ מְבָ֣רֲכֶ֔יךָ וּמְקַלֶּלְךָ֖ אָאֹ֑ר וְנִבְרְכ֣וּ בְךָ֔ כֹּ֖ל מִשְׁפְּחֹ֥ת הָֽאֲדָמָֽה:

Mazal tov to you, my beloved and only son, Zachariah! This past Shabbat was your Bar Mitzvah. My dear husband and I rented the fanciest hall in our city, hired caterers and music and had decorations prepared...

 And then we realized - perhaps now isn't the time for big adult parties. It's been my dream for years to plan a Bar Mitzvah celebration fit for a 13 year old boy and his friends and that's what we did. The fancy hall was cancelled, caterers were juggled and a most beautiful 25 hours of celebrations ensued!
 It's truly a once in a lifetime moment that a mother gets to go to Shul (synagogue) and hear her son read her favorite parsha from the Torah; Parshat Lech Lecha.

 In this parsha, we learn that G*d spoke to Avram, and told him him, “Go from your land, from your birthplace and from your father’s house, to the land which I will show you.” 

 Many of our friends, who were present at the Kiddush after Shul, are blessed and were lucky enough to have experienced making Aliya (moving to Israel) to the HolyLand. I looked around our Shul hall into a sea of friendly faces; our beloved friends who baked fancy baked goods and made gorgeous platters of fruit and vegetables, and even one dear friend made THREE types of homemade herring for the occasion!

 It takes immense faith to "go from your land" and make a new home in the Middle East, however in 1991, I arrived in Israel with my parents and 3 of my 5 brothers and in 2000 my future husband, your Abba (father) made Aliya to marry me - but that's a whole other story....

 Chasdei Shamayim, Hashem blessed us with 2 perfect daughters and when the time came for #3, I yearned for YOU, Zachariah, a son. Perhaps my yearning wasn't as painful and profound as our mother, Sarah and Father Avraham, however I prayed night and day for you, my beloved son to come down from the Heavens to be our child; our son.

And God said to Abraham, "Your wife Sarai-you shall not call her name Sarai, for Sarah is her name.
טווַיֹּ֤אמֶר אֱלֹהִים֙ אֶל־אַבְרָהָ֔ם שָׂרַ֣י אִשְׁתְּךָ֔ לֹֽא־תִקְרָ֥א אֶת־שְׁמָ֖הּ שָׂרָ֑י כִּ֥י שָׂרָ֖ה שְׁמָֽהּ:
16And I will bless her, and I will give you a son from her, and I will bless her, and she will become [a mother of] nations; kings of nations will be from her. "טזוּבֵֽרַכְתִּ֣י אֹתָ֔הּ וְגַ֨ם נָתַ֧תִּי מִמֶּ֛נָּה לְךָ֖ בֵּ֑ן וּבֵֽרַכְתִּ֨יהָ֙ וְהָֽיְתָ֣ה לְגוֹיִ֔ם מַלְכֵ֥י עַמִּ֖ים מִמֶּ֥נָּה יִֽהְיֽוּ:
17And Abraham fell on his face and rejoiced, and he said to himself, "Will [a child] be born to one who is a hundred years old, and will Sarah, who is ninety years old, give birth?"יזוַיִּפֹּ֧ל אַבְרָהָ֛ם עַל־פָּנָ֖יו וַיִּצְחָ֑ק וַיֹּ֣אמֶר בְּלִבּ֗וֹ הַלְּבֶ֤ן מֵאָֽה־שָׁנָה֙ יִוָּלֵ֔ד וְאִ֨ם־שָׂרָ֔ה הֲבַת־תִּשְׁעִ֥ים שָׁנָ֖ה תֵּלֵֽד:
 Unlike Avraham or Sarah, I didn't laugh. I cried tears of joy - still only in my 20's.... and when you were 8 days old, we brought you to "the altar" of the Shul and a special bond was created, as a “sign of the covenant between you and Hashem" - just as Avraham was commanded.

 G‑d told Avraham that, he will be made into a great nation and we know this to be true and everything that G*d does is good!

 From the moment that I first held you in my arms and looked into your kind eyes, I knew you would be the son I prayed for. 

 Zachariah, you are adored by all who know you. You are intelligent beyond your years - how many boys can solve a Rubiks Cube in mere seconds?! 
 If I had to choose one attribute that stands out the most, it is your selflessness and chessed. Your kindness goes beyond that of the average young man or boy. You put others first and emulate the chessed of Avraham Aveinu. Wherever I go, I hear that very sentiment; from your teachers and rabbis, other parents, and of course your family.

 From birth, you were a happy and content infant and child. Zachariah, you're not known to complain and through your gratitude for everything that you have - you are a content person. In your content and gracious nature, I see the greatness of our Father, Avraham.

On Shabbat, Parshat Lech Lecha, you reminded us of the greatness of Avraham and the gratitude that he possessed.

 Avraham's life was a life full of contentment because even when times were were difficult, he never stopped being mindful of all of the great things that Hashem blessed him with.

 I hope that you will continue to walk the path of Avraham:
welcoming and caring for others

 You, Zachariah, are full of gratitude for what you have and this contentment, this gratitude will take you far in life.

 And so his story begins; the story of my son, the young man, Zachariah, the content and kind one who I pray shall continue to walk the path of contentment, kindness, and gratitude.

 I am truly grateful to have witnessed the day my only son became a man - in the eyes of G*d and the holy Torah. Bless you, my son, I will love you forever.

Please continue to pray for Ahava Emunah bat Chava Ehta

Thursday, August 30, 2018

Second Day Of Treatment At Chemo Thermia....

My dad and I are currently in Istanbul, Turkey. I'm receiving treatments at a prestigious clinic, attempting to save my life using both conventional and well-known varieties of chemotherapies as well as scientifically studied and proven treatments which, focus on cancer as a metabolic disease.

We landed in Istanbul, Turkey earlier this week and began consulting in person with the physicians at the  Chemo Thermia Clinic. Over the past months and weeks, my physical quality of life has declined drastically. When we arrived at the airport in Tel Aviv, I was already having difficulty walking. Luckily, I received wheelchair assistance. The flight was under 2 hours and by the time we landed, I could no longer walk on my own and was again assisted with wheelchair assistance from the aircraft to the waiting driver, who arrived to pick us up from the clinic.

We're staying less than a 5 minute walk from Chemo Thermia Clinic and have been driven back and forth whenever necessary because at this point in time, I'm unable to walk more than a few meters.

On Tuesday evening, I completed my first treatments at the clinic. It was one of the most difficult days of my life. I received infusions of vitamins, antioxidants, anti-nausea, 4 types of chemotherapy, and Avastin. I also received two of the most intensely grueling treatments I've ever experienced: hyperthermia and oxygen in a hyperbaric chamber.
Hyperbaric O2 chamber
We returned to the hotel and I could no longer stand on my own two feet. I cried and climbed into bed and went to sleep.
I slept through the night without painkillers and the next morning was able to walk from our room, to the lobby, and to the awaiting car.

The treatments on Wednesday were less grueling yet very tiring as I received intense local treatments, oxygen, and infusions of antioxidants. I also spent an hour in the hyperbaric O2 chamber. 
On arrival at the hotel, I was able to walk in, take a shower, and walk around the room. Feeling even the smallest positive changes in my condition is certainly encouraging.

Since we've been here, we've met patients from all over the world: Iraq, England, Scotland, Africa, the USA, Russia, and of course many non-English speaking countries throughout Europe and Asia. The bond that these patients share is that they arrived at the clinic with stage 4 cancer and within 3 months many of them have clean PET CT scans! Many of these patients are in remission and it's remarkable to view their PET CT scans. We have been talking with everyone we can about their journeys - especially my dad, who has a lot of time to interact with other patients and their loved ones while I receive full days of treatments.  My dad and I have met and seen scans from patients with many different types of cancer.

In addition to the treatments that patients at Chemo Thermia receive, we are also given many bottles of medications which are inclusive in the expenses of the other treatments. 

The Chemo Thermia Clinic is using methods to kill cancer that are not new. They're in direct touch with top researchers including professor Thomas Seyfried of Boston University who until now does ALL  of his research in the labs - on mice and rats. Dr. Abdul Slocum works closely with Professor Seyfried and as a medical practitioner, Dr. Slocum is able to treat patients using the models developed by researchers like Professor Seyfried to treat cancer as a metabolic disease using so many modalities as well as conventional chemotherapies which, every oncologist is familiar with.

The case studies speak for themselves.

We met Brian with stage 4 esophageal cancer who was expected to live with his advanced  state for only 8 months. He has been very friendly and forthcoming in sharing his personal story with us both in person and on the Clinic's website where there are many other success stories available for viewing.

I am here... and we are praying for similar results - hopefully remission! There are countless stories and people eager to share them! 

Please continue to pray for Ahava Emunah bat Chava Ehta.

Sunday, August 26, 2018

It's (NOT) About Me

I hope that my beloved readers have had a wonderful and blessed summer. 

Summertime can be difficult for working parents or those who already feel the financial strain of both the last and impending years. 
Summer is hot!
Summer is expensive!
Summer is a wonderful time for both the trees and the flowers to grow.... and the children seem to need the miracles of summer-sun too.

As Summertime approached, I greatly feared how and what I could do, in my gradually worsening condition, to make positive summer memories for my family and myself. While the world has been away on summer vacations and trips, working, and whatnot, Cancer has been on full time high drive, making my life more and more difficult to enjoy in any physical sense.

I am thankful and blessed to have such loving and special people in my life. The love and kindness that is showered on my children and my whole family comes from such pure and modest loved ones and I am careful about what I'm willing to share. Believe it or not, there are some things that I keep strictly private.

While I seem to stay in a perpetual state of "everything is great" and "As long as I can live like this for years and years.... I'm happy and fine".... That state of being physically able to be "happy and fine" while in constant pain has become unbearable. 

I've reached a junction. Mortality is becoming stronger and stronger. The PET CT scans show the progression. Without me needing to actually even see the results, I know.

My dad went to work researching treatments.  If you remember past posts about the Ketogenic Diet and Lifestyle, you'll know what we have been looking into and I'm even surprised that that was back in May, exactly a year after investigating the last very important treatments that I underwent at UCSD, in San Diego, California.  

The professor that’s famous for the current treatments we're about to try is Professor Thomas Seyfried, a professor at Boston University, known for his cancer research and specifically treating cancer as a metabolic disease. 

Of course with every treatment that I do, we’re hoping for miracles. The treatments I am going for are NOT experimental however I must remember that my hope must be stronger than my expectations; nothing is promised to me and each day that I am given is an invaluable gift. 

My dad researched the treatment and the science behind it and we believe that it could save my life. We wish to and plan to work together with every member of my oncology team; weighing in on their experience and expertise in every way that we can while making choices and decisions about my care. These treatments are only available for humans in Istanbul, Turkey, which is where I will be traveling to, with my father this week, to begin treatment.

I’ve read and watched many research papers and videos and compiled what I believe to be a good cross section of the methods used at Chemo Thermia Clinic in Istanbul, Turkey.

This is a scholarly article from Professor Seyfried‘s book: 

Below is an approximately 1 hour YouTube video presented by Professor Thomas Seyfried of Boston University including a lengthy interview with Dr. Abdul Slocum. 

One of the things that Professor Slocum had to say which, impressed me was a personal understanding of who I am and what I believe in regarding my own disease, regarding myself being an exceptional patient. Dr Abdul Slocum - who is the one who’s become an expert on the details of my case has made it pretty clear that he’s memorized my PET CT scans and patient history. This treatment is really important for me as my illness has progressed and I needed to find something that is special and specific to my body and course of disease. While Dr.s Slocum and Mehmet Salih iyikesici recognize the advanced state of my disease, they’re still optimistic about treating me because I keep myself strong and fit physically and because I have an exceptional patient’s outlook and attitude. They have witnessed that people who are exceptional in that way do better overall in treatment and have better prognosis’s when their will to live is very strong; like mine. My physical fitness is very important to them and the fact that “I am NOT cancer” and that I choose to live an almost normal life IN SPITE of cancer gives me the status of an exceptional and compliant patient that will follow through even with “annoying/difficult” physical challenges as part of the treatments. They’re absolutely NOT making any promises however they feel that I’m a very good candidate for metabolic treatment of cancer and it will be given in tandem with multiple types of chemotherapy: Taxotere, Avastin, Gemcitabine, Cisplatin and Doxil. The doses are low and given in tandem with the other treatments. I'm pretty sure that I will lose my hair (again) but we don't know yet.

I am excited and terrified about this next stage in my treatment and my life. I'm doing it - not for myself - but for my precious 5 young children who, need a mother. I pray that this will be the beginning of the end to skepticism as I did promise myself that I would "never do chemotherapy again"

My life isn't about me. My life is a miracle and a blessing and I will do all I can to give as much of it as I can to my family and of course to serve the Almighty Above.

Please pray for Ahava Emunah bat Chava Ehta

Here we go.....

Saturday, July 21, 2018

Six Years of Cancer

Six years.
July, 2012

I knew something wasn’t right. For some time I’d been feeling sluggish, bloated, tired, and simply “not me”. I kept going back to my doctors; anyone who would listen to me for any type of support. I pushed hard because I felt that something was wrong yet none of my doctors were alarmed and my basic blood counts were all normal aside from the vitamin D deficiency. I was deflated and felt alone and misunderstood. 

As a busy mother of 5 young children, including a breastfeeding tot, I had run out of choices other than to accept that perhaps there wasn’t “anything wrong with me”. I resigned myself to being a 36 year old wife and mother who was no longer fit and energetic - even though I’d always been the example of good health in body, mind, and spirit.  In 2012, I felt haggard and run down. I was no longer the energetically inspired mommy that I’d always strived to be. 

I was depressed. 
I felt like a failure.
I was misunderstood.
My family doctors let me down.

The irregular spotting that I experienced a few days earlier was a sign. I immediately made an emergency appointment with an obstetrician gynecologist and went on to wait impatiently through a day and a Shabbat to arrive at that terrible day....

July 22nd, 2012 arrived and I eventually arrived at the emergency room after visiting the ob/gyn.
July 22, 2012 - Emergency Room
Ultrasound was a disaster.
CT scans confirmed that the disaster was cancerous.

July 26th, 2012: I underwent major surgery to remove an aggressive and cancerous tumor - the size of an average newborn baby - from my abdomen and life has never been the same.

I had surgery on a Thursday.
July 26th, 2012 - post surgery

I remained in the hospital over Shabbat.

Then it was the saddest day on the Jewish calendar: Tisha B’Av - The 9th day of Av.

This evening, as the sun set, the 9th of Av began. It’s actually the 10th of Av because when 9 B’Av lands on the Sabbath, it’s not observed until the following day. 

The saddest day of the year reflects the destruction of both Temples - may they be speedily rebuilt in our time! May Mashiach arrive.... now! Please G-d!

Six years.
Six years of blessings - I am alive!
Six years that the L-rd continues to bless me with miracles!
I pray to continue to be blessed with such miraculous blessings everyday.

Thank You G-d for all You provide!
Thank You L-rd, All Mighty, for your love and for saving me from death so many times.

I am sometimes sad for the moments that I’ve missed yet I remind myself how very blessed and lucky I am that G-d blesses me with another day on this earth.

Another day to breathe.
Another day to celebrate motherhood.
Another day of life.

Thank You God!